The concept of ego is a funny thing. I’ve studied psychology for four years, understanding what it is, and the rest of my life after college, exploring its practical use. And I suppose, outside academia or among practitioners of psychology, ego can mean many, very different things. Most especially, those who use it in the self-help space.

I can’t help but think that we’re blaming ego for whatever’s wrong with our mental health, but at the same time, recommending that we strengthen it to improve our state. This self-help sentiment leaves me confused. I could go on about what ego is within the field of psychology, but that would be a bore. So instead, I’m going to tell you something that will probably puzzle you, too.

Ego is a meta-metaphysical concept.

You can have it. You can remove it every now and then. You can go with your life without it.

It is a lens through which you view the world, a filter through which you understand whatever’s coming at you.

Should you decide to, you don’t need an ego for anything.

Then again, I don’t know what’s wrong with you, or what you think is wrong with you. I do know what’s wrong with the present-day society and culture, though. It’s tough to live nowadays, and you can’t find the energy to do anything about it because everything wants you to remain distracted. Diverting from what is expected of you, from following the flow of the current, is tiresome. It can get lonely, too, if you can’t find like-minded people. The current structure makes it hard to find your people, go against the grain like you wanted to do. I can tell you how to find a solution for that, but I’ll just make you even more tired. So I’ll make this simple.

Audit the stuff you give a fuck about. Set a limit to how many you can have in a day, and assign those to things that deeply matter to you. If you’ve run out of fucks for other things, well, gee, that’s bad luck. Move on.

I don’t recommend giving a fuck about your ego, or your lack of one. After all, does an ego really exist?

Ego is not what you need when you downplay yourself. What you need is reckless abandon

10/13/2025